My internet home is over at Love on a Budget http://www.redemptionisbeautiful.blogspot.com where I share all things of motherhood, love, life, Jesus, and whatever else I feel like, ha. I am honored to share here on Allie’s blog. She has been a dear friend of mine since high school, so dear in fact that we were both in each other’s weddings three years after graduating.
Whenever we have the chance to reconnect it is like we had just talked the day before. She is a forever friend I am extremely grateful for her friendship. When she asked if I would like to guest post here of course I said yes. She asked if I would share on grace.
Coincidentally, gracious is our family word for the year so it couldn’t be a more perfect topic. My husband and I decided on this word because the year prior was rough on us spiritually, emotionally, and physically and we found ourselves frequently not extending grace to one another and/or others. So, GRACIOUS it was.We wanted a change in how we were living… acting. A revolution in our home.
Well, saying all of that is nice but when it comes down to those tough moments, it is then that you are really tested. Little did I know that what I really needed was the GRACE of God in order to extend grace to others.
[2 Corinthians 12:9 “But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly in my weaknesses so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”]–so good. PRAISE THE LORD.
This past week has been a HARD momma week. Judah, my 10 month old, came down with a cold. Fever, cough, sneezing. Poor little dear. He would NOT sleep in his crib for anything which led to me having to sleep with him and away from my husband. This only lasted for two nights[Monday and Tuesday], but they were a loooong two nights. I also keep an extra little person about once a week [which I love], but can add to stress/tiredness on my part at times. For some reason Sailor decided to act out more than usual as well. He’s 2 years old. He’s learning to obey and how to play with babies and not hurt them at the same time, ha.
Due to lack of sleep and stress, my fuse was so short. My patience was thin. Self control was practically out the window. I literally just didn’t know how to be a mother of a 2 year old this week. I felt defeated. I felt like a terrible mother,well person for that matter. I was questioning why God entrusted this little soul to me when I feel like all I do is push him further away from the Father.
Today I just called up my husband while he was at work and had a good cry, exposing all of my short comings. Telling him how I felt like I couldn’t be a good mother to our two year old. He encouraged me, he extended the grace I so desperately needed to me, he told me to repent and to start over. And I did just that.
I asked Sailor to forgive me for yelling and for not being gentle or loving. I told him that I asked God to forgive me as well and I actually asked God out loud in front of him, to help me be more loving and kind and patient today. God’s grace was my power today. He gave me a fresh idea on how to deal with a 2 year old’s rebellion, and you know what? It worked! The rest of the day I was patient and in control. You know why? Because I relied on Christ’s GRACE.
I could go on and on, but I will leave you with this: I can’t do this momma thing without it, or rather without Him. He is my ROCK, my STRENGTH, my POWER. I am so thankful that his mercies are new every morning and that he is bigger than my sin. The hearts of my children are in His hands and I can rest in that. My prayer is that my shortcomings will point them to Christ because as He said, “my power is made perfect in weakness” and boy am I ever weak.