A Handwritten Apology

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My oldest sister is a poet. She’s seeing a sweet, sweet man. A songwriter. He treats her well and makes her laugh. Makes her feel beautiful, again. Although she’s always been gorgeous.

But she’s assured me they’re nothing serious. They just happen to be on the same wave length, that’s all. They’re both artists, just-past their prime, they have children from previous marriages and so on. Like, they just get each other.

Lately though, she hasn’t been herself. I noticed mostly after her accident. But – losing it all. I think that’s what she’s truly afraid of. I really try to help her as much as I can. Yesterday I went over, to give her a hand with the kids and tidy up her place. Let me just say, I’ve never been one to snoop through things that don’t belong to me. But for some odd reason I was drawn to an open spiral notebook, next to a shifty stack of bills on her desk. There lay a handwritten apology.

To Scott, My closest friend-

If anything happens
And you never hear from me again
And we never exchange another word
Not another sentiment
Know that I love you, at my core
And I apologize
Because you have won me over
Without even trying
In a way I could never say

This is as real as it gets.
This is the only world in which we can exists, together
A world of words

You opened your mouth
And built me a house
You sung me a porch swing and garden
I see it all in my head
You guide your pen
And let your ink
To comfort me in bed

Our art, mingled
Makes our hearts proud
Running down the halls
Like the laughter of children

I apologize

Because we’re friends

And you’re probably stunned

But at least here, on a page

I’ll have you
And love you

I apologize

I’ll never have the courage to prove it

((Photo by mrsdkrebs  – Denise Krebs ))

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